Perfection

This information is thanks to various authors. It can be found in many different places so its hard to say who came up with it first :)

Perception is Projection:

What we See in the World is a Reflection of Ourselves.

So if there's someone out there who really annoys you (me? lol), it's because there's a quality in you - you see in that person- that annoys you. If you say "You are stupid" it flips around to say "I really hope I'm not stupid otherwise everyone will hate me". It stems from fear.

The opposite is also true. If we think "Wow, I love how confident this person is" it's because we have this in ourselves too. Louise L Hay plays with this concept in "You Can Heal your Life", using affirmations to eliminate self-hatred and fear. Many of these patterns stem from our parents or relatives.

Our perception is also shaped by our feelings.

For example, if you're laughing your head off, the world looks a lot brighter. It becomes effortless to see the good things in life. However, if you are feeing awful, it becomes all too easy to criticize and critique. Again, it is a reflection of something within yourself. Not many people realize how much impact our feelings have on our perception, but there you go.

All this self-love stuff isn't about being "stuck up" or "thinking you're better than everyone else". It's important because when you love yourself, you can be your most authentic self, your world will reflect this and other people will love you in return. You can also love others a great deal more, and that is awesome! It feels nice to love others, I hope you agree?

What does this have to do with perfection? Well:

If you don't believe perfection exists or can't see someone else as being perfect, you don't believe you are perfect.

Okay a great deal of fears, emotions (anger, maybe?), "wow that doesn't make any sense" or questions probably shot up right there. What are they? What are you afraid of? Why do you feel that way? It's important. Take a moment to figure out what it is. Listen to yourself. Mine was:

"But if I don't insult myself, then someone else will"

The reply was "Only if you think that way".

Which is true. Our thoughts are self-fulfilling prophecies in a lot of ways, so I decided to send out what I wanted instead of people hating me. Once I had determinedly drilled it into my head, I suddenly found myself drawn to a different group of friends. I wasn't shunning my old friends, I just was more comfortable in a new group. The same thing can happen to you.

When you love and respect yourself, and know there are people out there who love you unconditionally, you will no longer want to hang around others who think of you in a "negative" way, and you will naturally find others who love you exactly the way you are. Not saying these people are "bad", they're just living in a self-created fear-prison (Donnie Darko, anyone?).

Many find this hard to understand, because we have been loved based on conditions. "Oh, if you're not this, and this, and this... then I won't love you". After a while, we learn that is "normal". But all it is showing is that this "lover" will only love themselves if they fit a number of conditions. This self-hatred is worthy of compassion and attention, because, well, I love you! I can relate, and if it was me I would like someone to love me, so I don't mind if you hate yourself.

"What is in a name? A rose if given any other name would smell as sweet"

- Romeo and Juliet

I used to be someone who would insult EVERYONE I came across in my head. "Oh, you're fat. You're ugly. You're stupid. You're annoying, shut the hell up... etc". But once I started loving myself, all those thoughts vanished. They just faded away. I used to hate my parents. I now like them. I now like lots of people that used to annoy me. Instead I can look someone in the face, say "I love you" and not feel weird about it at all. And the best bit is people give me a hug and say "I LOVE YOU TOO!!!" =D

I'm probably doing a terrible job of explaining this, and if I am I'm sorry. But I hope it has helped somewhat.

Wynter